There are times in my life when I feel a long way from anyone. I had a few when I was in Japan. I used to wind up the stereo, lie on the floor, stare at the ceiling and let the music wash over me. The floor is the best place to be when you are feeling lonely. The Bad Loves and the Cruel Sea have been long time companions during times like this. Jack Johnson and Maroon 5 more recent ones.
If a person's life is measured by the impact that they have one the lives of others, at these times I wonder if my life will amount to any more a ripple on storm swept ocean. Usually I deal with it with a stiff upper lip and a cup of tea. Or coffee. Or a beer. Or more.
One thing to be said for times like this are that they can motivate you to do things, or say things that you would usually keep locked away inside. If I were a better person, I wouldn't need to find myself is such a pensive mod before being willing to let down the walls a little. If I were a better person I would be a very different person.
If wishes were fishes, pigs would fly.
I once told a old friend of mine that happiness is an illusion. All the other emotions - fear, anger, despair, grief, sorrow and regret - were real. But happiness was a lie. I was such a fool. I wish I could catch up with her to tell her so. But then, perhaps she already knows.
thotd
3 comments:
Andy you moody old bastard. You know English isn't my forte so I'll just say it. Though you maybe feeling lonely at this time, know that there are people out there thinking of you and hoping that you're well. Take it easy on yourself mate. We'll have a bit of a chin wag when you're free, Get in contact with me anytime.
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